कुछ मैंने कहा.…… kuch maine k'ha

कुछ मैंने कहा.……  

 तुम और मैं 

मैंने,

 जीवन के इस करधे में,

 रंगीन रेशमी सपनों की बाती,

 कात कात कहानियां बुनी, 

ताकि तुम्हें सुना सकूँ सभी,

 फिर सहेज कर रख दी दराज़ में ,सभी,

 कहा कुछ भी नहीं... 

तुम, 

सुन कर भी अनसुना कर दो शायद,

 जैसे शब्द सब अनाथ हों मेरे, 

कोई सुने न उन्हें तो बेचारे,

 अक्षर अक्षर हो  हवाओं मैं गुम न जायें,

 अब गाहे गाहे दराज़ खोल सुन लेती हूँ उन्हें, 

मैं …

~ विन्नी ३१/५/१४ 

Tum aur main

Maine

Jeevan ke is kardhe main

Rangeen reshmi sapnon ki bati

Kaat kaat kahaneeyan bunee

Taqi tumhe suna sakoon Sabhi

Phir sahej kar rakh deye daraaz main, sabhi

Tum

Sun kar Bhi ansuna kar do Shayad

Jaise shabd Sab annath ho mere

Koi sune na unhe to bechare

akshar akshar ho hawaon main gum na jayen...

Ab gahe gahe daraaz khol sun leti hoon unhe...

main...

-vinny31/5/14

धूप किनारा twilight

धूप  किनारा 
रात अचानक नहीं आती, 
न दिन की धुप चढ़ती है, 
पूरी की पूरी, यक ब  यक, 
एक वक़्फ़ा  रहता है हमेशा, 
दोनों वक़्तों के दरमियाँ, 
उस लम्हा यूं लगता है जैसे , 
कुछ बदला न हो,
लेकिन महसूस करो तो,
दिखाई देता है,
कुछ घटता जाता है, 
कतरा कतरा ख़ारिज होता जाये जैसे, 
और इन्ही  वक़्तों में ,
उस अजनबी सी चाप पर कान लगा , 
हमें पढ़ लेना होता है, 
कुदरत के उन बारीक इशारों को, 
जिनमे आने वाले वक़्त का, 
नया निज़ाम छिपा  रहता है,
इन्ही धूप  किनारा वक़्फ़ों  में...
~ विन्नी 
२८/५/१४ 

  Twilight

Raat achanak nahin aati

Na din ki dhoop chadhti hai

Poori ki poori yak ba  yak

Ek waqfa rehta hai hamesha,

Donon waqton ke darmiyan

Us lamha  Yoon lagta hai

 jaise kuch badlla na ho,

Lekin mehsoos karo to

 dikhayee deta hai

Kuch ghatta jaata hai

Katara katra kharij hota jaiye jaise

Aur inhee waqton main

us ajnabi see cahaap par kaan laga

Hamen padh lena hota hai

kudrat ke un bareek isharon ko

jinme Aane wale waqt ka 

naya nizam chipa rehta hai

inhee dhoop kinara waqfon main…

~Vinny

28/5/14

मैं Main

मैं

 दौड़ती रही हूँ मैं

 हर सुबह,

नए उगे सूरज के संग,

हर रात,

चाँद के पीछे पीछे,

जैसे दिशा नहीं कोई मेरी अपनी,

गिरह बंधी हो जैसे ,

अंतहीन यात्रा, जीवन कहीं नहीं,

फिर एक रोज़,

पानियों के किनारे चलते चलते ,

समुन्दर छलक पड़ा,

और तुम,संग अपने अपना सीप लिए,

चल दिए एक दिशा,

मेरे लिबास पर एकनई इबारत लिखते,

सांसों की एक नयी लय जीते,

अब जी करता है,

यहीं ठहर जाएं ज़रा

 भर लूं  इन लम्हों से अपनी झोली ,

लेकिन सवाल  वही  है,

अब भी,

कितनी गिरह खोली  हैं मैंने,

कितनी अभी बाक़ी हैं। 

 ~ विन्नी
28/5/14 

Main
Doodhtee rahi hoon main
Har subah, 

Naye uge suraj ke sang
Har raat

 chand ke peeche peeche
Jaise Disha nahin koi meri apni
Gireh bandi ho jaise,
Antheen yatra, jeevan kahin nahin...
Phir ek roz,
paaniyon ke kinare chalte chalte ,
samundar chalak pada
aur tum,
Sang apne apna seep liye
Chal diye ek disha...
Mere libaas par ek nayi ibarat likhte 

sanson ki ek nayi ley jeete
Ab jee karta hai
Yaheen theher jaayen Zara
Bhar loon in lamhon se apni jhooli,
Lekin sawal vahi hai 

ab Bhi
kitni gireh kholi hain Maine
Kitni Abhi baki hain....
-Vinny
28/5/14

तुम और मैं Tum aur Main (Kalbaishakh)

Kalbaishaik is a bengali term for the Nor'westerners that usher in the Monsoon, serve as precursors... they are short , swift and intense, often destructive as well. a great deal of dust and wind, followed by short sharp spells of rain, gone as quickly as they come as well...

life can be such, and people too....
we had one last eve...

तुम और मैं 

तुम कहाँ से आते हो,

कहाँ के हो जाते हो,

बरसते हो , तो घनघोर 

 बह जाता है घटाओं संग

 हर वह रंग,

जो फीका पुराना हो चला  हो ,

लेकिन जब मुड़ जाते हो 

फिर कुछ शेष नहीं रहता,

सब अकसमात, अनियंत्रित,

मन की किसी मौज सा ,

यहां,

सब बिखर जाता है,

तुम्हारे वेग में , कालबैशाख ,

मैं 

रेगिस्तान की बारिश की तरह ,

माध्यम ,

जहाँ की हूँ ,

वहीं की हूँ,

तपती  धरती समेट लेती है, 

मेरी बूँद बूँद, 

और उसी में समां जाता है मेरा अस्तित्व,

फिर से उसी धरती से,

उगने के लिए,

नाल गड़ी  है मेरी,

इसी रेत में ,

और तुम?

तुम कहाँ के हो,कालबैशाख?

~ विन्नी २६/५/१४. 

Tum aur Main

Tum,

Kahan se aate ho,

Kahan ke ho jaate ho

Baraste ho to ghanghoor

Beh jaata hai ghattaon sang

Har woh  rang,

jo pheeka purana ho chala ho,

Lekin, jab mudh jate ho phir

Kuch shesh nahin rehta

Sab aksamat, aneyantrit

Man ki kisi mauj sa

Yahaan,

sab bikhar jata hai

Tumhare vaig main, Kalbaishak,

Main

Registaan ki bearish ki tarah

Madhayam,

Jahan ki hoon,

Vaheen ki hoon,

Tapti dharti samaet leti hai

Meri har boond

Aur usi main sama jaata hai

Mera astitiv

Phir se usi dharti se

Ugne ke liye

naal gadi hai meri,

isi raet main,

Aur tum?

tum kahan ke ho, kalbaishak?

~Vinny

25/5/14

ख्वाब...Khwab

aaj phir jeene ki tamaana hai,

aaj phir marne ka iraada hai..!

i know that the mind is all powerful and that changing perception and thought, changes the world as we know it...

however, that's not always accomplished with ease, and i will take whatever help is extended...willingly and with open arms...!

ख्वाब

रात के तीसरे पहर

कुछ आहट   हुई

मुड़ कर देखा तो वही ख्वाब था

मुद्दतों  बाद लौट आया था,

वही दमकता ख्वाब,

रंगरेज़ के सारे रंग चुरा लाया हो जैसे,

हँसता, खिलखिलाता, उछलता, कूदता,

बाहें फैलाये पुकार रहा था मुझे,

नशा सा फैला था उस के गिर्द

कह रहा हो जैसे,

आ, जी ले मुझे…

~ विन्नी

२३/५/१४

(c) mine

Khwab
Raat ke teesre peher,
Kuch aahat huee,
Mudh ke dekha to wahi khwab tha,
Mudhaton baad laut aaya tha,
Wahi damakta khwab,
Rangrez ke sare rang chura laya ho jaise,
Hasta khilkhilata uchalta koodtta,
Bahen failaye , pukar raha tha mujhe,
Nasha sa faila tha us ke gird,
Keh raha ho jaise,
Aa jee le mujhe...
~Vinny

23/5/14

(c) mine

बोल कि लब आज़ाद हैं तेरे bol kelab aazaad hain tere...

बोल कि लब आज़ाद हैं तेरे

came up in a conversation today 

the necessity of this kind of freedom

the very quintessence of the human condition...

Faiz, at his very best

बोल कि लब आज़ाद हैं तेरे
बोल ज़बाँ अब तक तेरी है
तेरा सुतवाँ जिस्म है तेरा
बोल कि जाँ अब तक् तेरी है
देख के आहंगर की दुकाँ में
तुंद हैं शोले सुर्ख़ है आहन
खुलने लगे क़ुफ़्फ़लों के दहाने
फैला हर एक ज़न्जीर का दामन
बोल ये थोड़ा वक़्त बहोत है
जिस्म-ओ-ज़बाँ की मौत से पहले
बोल कि सच ज़िंदा है अब तक
बोल जो कुछ कहने है कह ले 

~ Faiz Ahmad Faiz

Invictus ( Latin, for unconquered )

Account ID: pub-9127121524786722

Client ID: ca-pub-9127121524786722

This poem, published in 1888, was born out of the personal difficulties that William Henley faced, among them ,physical disability and poverty.

yet his indomitable spirit would not be conquered.

His fame rests largely on this one remarkable poem.

It has always always, helped me deal with my own quandaries...
sharing in the hope that you'll like it to.. 

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul. 

William Ernest Henley

jeest ka aasa'n hona... जीस्त का आसान होना

in memory of happier times....

perhaps this will cheer me up today...and you, all those who read...

tum aur main

एक पल में  सदियों के इंतज़ार का मुक्कम्मल होना ,

गुलों का सुर्ख, दिल का शादाब होना,

अब हर लम्हा खुश, हर सांस बहकी ,

रूह को मसर्रत , दिलों को आराम होना .

देख तुम्हे रूबरू दिल का बेईमान होना,

हज़ारों  ख्वाइशों का फिर फिर जवान होना,

अब कैसा सब्र, किस बात  की फिक्र,

होने भी दो वो ,जिस का है लाज़िम होना .

आसान है इश्क़ में हस्ती का बेमानी होना ,

जैसे समुन्दर में किसी दरिया का गर्क होना,

 अब कहाँ तक तुम हो और कहाँ तक मैं ,

कोई तुमको पुकारे तो मेरा मुखातिब होना .

आखिर कुदरती है हर गुल का बदरंग होना,

हर बहार का खिज्र से मुक़ाबिल होना, 

अब रंज कैसा, किस बात का गम,

ज़ाहिर हैख़ाक से फिर कायनात का कायम होना .

लाज़िम है फिर हर मुश्किल का आसान होना,

 गर आता हो तुझे इश्क़ में फ़ना होना ,

अब किस बात का खौफ, किस बात की दहशत,

मौत भी आये तो है जीस्त का आसान होना .

~ विन्नी १७/५/१४ 

Tum aur main

ek pal  main sadiyon ke intezzar ka mukammal hona
Gulon ka surkh, dil ka shadaaab hona,
Ab har lamha khush, har saans behki,
Rooh ko massarat, Dillon ko aaraaam hona...

Dekh tumhe rubaru, dil ka beimaan hona
Hazaron khwaish on ka phir phir jawan hona
Ab kaisa sabr kis baat ki fiqr,
Hone Bhi do wo , jis ka hai lazim hona

Aasa'n hai Ishq main hasti ka bemani hona
Jaise samunder main kisi dariya ka gark hona
Ab kahan tak tum ho aur kahan tak main,
Koi tum ko pukare to mera mukhatib hona...

Aakhir kudrati hai har Gul ka badrang hona
Har bahaar ka khijr se muqabil hona
Ab ranj kaisa , kis baat ka gum
Zahir hai khak se phir kayanat ka kayam hona....

Lazim hai phir har mushkil ka aasa'n hona
Gar aata ho  tujhe ishq main fana hona
Ab kis baat ka khauf, kis sheh ki dehshat
Maut Bhi aaye to hai jeest ka aasa'n hona ...
~vinny

(c)

17/5/14

The Buddha and I

I was not initiated into the Sanatana Dharma , was born to a Jain father and a Sikh mother, both non practicing. They gave me a good education and an understanding that a morally edifying act leads to greater happiness than one which is of a negative connotation, to others or the self. That is all the ‘religion’ I have, and it has served me well. they gave me curiosity and taught me to question, to reject dogma, if it did not stand upto logic, and they gave me a voice and taught me words…

Needless to say, living in a country that is overtly religious, I have been exposed to many established institutionalized religious systems, and my curiosity has sought an understanding of them.

The Buddha’s religion has been of special interest. I feel an affinity and an empathy with him, am enamored of his wise words, he was indeed an enlightened soul.

Why do I say so? Three things I’ll delineate today….

1. He was explicit in this injunction that he had for all those who wished to follow in his path, “believe in something, only if it stands the test of your experience, not merely because I am telling you to do so. Indeed I say what I say, because I have experienced it, you do the same”

That has been my belief system!!! It is the rational way, and eliminates superstition as well as false consciousness, emphasizes understanding rather than meaningless practice.

“Now, Kalamas, don’t go by reports, by legends, by traditions, by scripture, by logical conjecture, by inference, by analogies, by agreement through pondering views, by probability, or by the thought, ‘This contemplative is our teacher.’ When you know for yourselves that, ‘These qualities are skillful; these qualities are blameless; these qualities are praised by the wise; these qualities, when adopted & carried out, lead to welfare & to happiness’ — then you should enter & remain in them.”

~the Kalama Sutta

2.“We all are what we think, all that we are arises from our thoughts.

 with our thoughts we make this world.”

That thought is premised on the importance of human agency, it is possible to create, alter, change, amend the way our lives are, if we as individuals can learn to perceive the cause of our unhappiness and take right action toward making amends. We, in other words, are the creators of our own destiny. That’s cause and consequence. Not predetermined karma, beyond the power of human agency!!! There is hope yet, “I am the master of my fate”!!!

3. “Have compassion for all, rich and poor alike. Some suffer too much, others too little.” We all suffer, and love, empathy compassion, in my perception is a basic human need. We all deserve these, no matter what the circumstances of our lives. He is known to have accepted all into the Sangha, rich and poor, pious and those not so pious, man and woman…ah now that last is a point to ponder.

It took considerable persuasion by Ananda and others for him to accede to the request of his step mother to join the Sangha and become a bikhuni. Eventually he created a separate Sangha for women and made special rules for them. (8 rules, not applicable to the Sangha for men).  That was a big step forward toward equity for women, recognition that they were spiritual beings too, and could attain salvation. However he never could quite overlook the physical differences between men and women. What were his views on women outside the Sangha, Sakyan and those not of the  Sakyan people? Patriarchy is insidious and it certainly had a role to play here, in the manner in which he thought and designed his Sanghas.

All religions, are patriarchal and the women’s question is often one not even acknowledged, let alone addressed. Buddhism was(is) more egalitarian than most religions , but it still had a long way to travel before it accepted absolute parity between men and women…

On the 14^th of April, this year, I was at a seminar that was organized to discuss Ambedhkar’s notion of Dhamma, that comes from Ambedhkar’s Buddist leanings of course. It was big international seminar, and present there were scholars from all over the world, of Buddhism, of Pali, of History, of Political Science. I voiced my questions and my concerns, not expecting anything other than a simple acknowledgement.

However, after I had finished speaking, a venerable person, garbed in the attire of a Buddhist Bihku, walked up to me and bowed his head, his hands folded in a Namaste.

He said he was an official of the Buddhist Sangha in Sri Lanka, that the questions I had asked had forced him to ponder and that he would use his authority within the Sangha to, raise a debate…that the question needed investigation and rethinking!!!

 I was spell bound by his gravitas and his humility, moved by the thought that I had perhaps at last found a kindred soul, who was in a situation to take the question further…

If the spirit of inquiry remains within the Sangha 2600 years after the Buddha’s passing ,  and allows a dialectical reasoning to function within and thence without, then, despite everything that may be wrong with the way the world is, there may indeed be something that is right….!

Vinny Jain

18/5/14

of Benaras and the Election

ibn e mariyam hua kare koi
mere dukh ki dawa kare koi...
that she'er written by the unparalleled Ghalib, describes my agony best these days.
i watched the election cavalcade march on, and today, as i write this we wait for the last round of polling tomorrow.
votes will be cast in Benaras too tomorrow, which for me in many ways symbolizes the issues at stake in this election, as well as the quantum shift witnessed in the style and content of electioneering.
benaras is the quintessence of Indian civilization, and by that i mean,not just its Hindu antecedents , but also the eons of multicultural harmony that has been its wont.
kashi is said to be founded on the Trishul of Shiva,on the banks of the mokshadayni Ganga, and is one of the holiest places for Hindus as death here grants vaikunth, access to the abode of the Gods and release from mortal sins. it has been large hearted enough to absorb the Buddhists and the Jains and the followers of Islam and evolved a syncretic ambien where diversity was food for thought. it became the centre of learning, nay indeed wisdom.
the Nawab Aziz ul Mulk, built a naubatkhana, opposite the kashi visvanath mandir, the shehnai used to play there during morning and evening aarti in the mandir. the Gyan vayapi Mosque is situated right next to that mandir, never has there been an issue between the temple and the mosque,the mullahs and the priests.
all that in the past. my fear is that this harmony may well be lost, that peace exiled and that animosity may become a welcome resident of the city.
 this city, able at best to support a populace of 4 lakhs, has 35 lakh residents, resulting in squalor and a crush that has to be seen to be believed.
there is on the river such pressure of human sins that its ability to regenerate is all but lost, no one seems to care.
the meaningless rituals of yester years go on regardless, with nary a thought for the city or the river that was once its life line.
the same seems to be true of politics in India. the politicians carry on regardless, with nary a thought for the land or its inhabitants.
regardless of who wins or who loses,what was at stake here in this microcosm, and in the macrocosm of this election was the idea of India. an India that is inclusive and diverse, or one that is exclusive and shut in, that consciously defines itself in narrow terms. growth becomes an exclusively economic entity, growth for whom and how are questions no longer of any relevance in the mainstream.
the fever and pitch of the campaign were such that they defiled my sensibilities, the rough and tumble not quite my cup of tea
i fear that i may be in a minority here...and that though times are about to descend on people like me...and much like the once glorious benaras, i will be consigned to history, as a relic of the past...
ending with a prayer that Ghalib had for Benaras...
तआलिल्ला बनारस चश्मे बद्दूर,
बहिश्ते ख़ुर्रमो फ़िरदौस मामूर...

( प्रभु! बनारस को बुरी नज़र से बचाना,
यह नन्दित स्वर्ग है, यह भरा-पूरा स्वर्ग है...)

इबादतख़ानए नाक़ूसियाँ अस्त,
हमाना काबए हिन्दोस्ताँ अस्त...

(यह शंखवादकों का उपासना स्थल है,
निश्चय ही यह हिन्दुस्तान का काबा है...)

-मिर्ज़ा गालिब

(dear Lord, save Benaras from the evil eye,
this is the garden of heaven, the fullness of paradise
it is the worship place of the conch sounders
the Kaaba of Hindoostan...)
vinny jain 
11/5/14